Tag: God is in control

Secure Fortress: Parenting Encouragement from Proverbs 14:26

He who fears the Lord has a secure fortress and for his children it will be a refuge ` Proverbs 14:26

There are so many times in life when I feel powerless as a parent.  I see the struggles my children go through and some of their situations are made worse because of my actions.  Their challenges are sometimes not that different from what mine have been, but I don’t want them to have those tough expediences.

I noticed the above scripture verse for the first time when my children were already grown.  It was a comfort for me.  It gave me hope that my life had been a benefit to my children in troubling times our family had experienced.  It gives an added dimension  to my role as a parent to my children.

This verse reminds me that my first focus needs to be on my relationship with God. This creates a secure fortress.  I’m not exactly sure how  that translates into making a refuge for my children,  but God’s promises are true and I can trust that He will work that out!!  (I think that I get in God’s way too often).

God loves me and my children more than I could ever imagine.  I can lay my burdens down at His feet and lift my hands in praise.

Praise the Lord, my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name.  Praise the Lord, my soul,  and forget not all his benefits—  Psalm 103:1,2

Preserving Traditions: Finding Meaning in Christmas Celebrations

On the first Christmas, long ago, Jesus came to earth.  The angels came and sang the joyful news to lowly shepherds who hastened to Bethlehem to see the baby lying in a manger.  (Luke 2:8-16 & 20).  It’s hard for me to imagine what that night must have been like — an amazing announcement by an angel  followed by a choir of angels.  It must have been so surreal, but still so real.  They were blessed when they responded to God’s prompting and returned from Bethlehem “glorifying and praising God”.  Awesome things  happen when we have the courage to go where God leads and then see His blessings when we look in the rear view mirror.

The first Christmas celebrations that I remember where spent with my parents and siblings — and my church family.  The evening our family opened our gifts also included a little program my siblings and I put on for our parents — a few Christmas carols and some readings.  At church, the Sunday school program was attended by most members of the church — a special event separate from the Christmas service.  My parents immigrated from the Netherlands two years before I was born, so our church family was a precious part of our lives.  Our little “family program” and the Sunday school program helped us focus on the reason for the season.  Our gifts were “things”, time and talents.  It’s a blessing to have this foundation that helps me focus through the busyness and noise.

When my children were little, we always had a dinner for “just us” as well as time spent with extended family.  We had lots of turkey some years.  The year after the end of my marriage, my children and I had a dinner for three.  Keeping that tradition was one of the easiest parts of that Christmas–everything else felt very wrong and broken.  For several years after, Christmas remained a difficult time for our family — but we were still blessed by those dinners.  Some people talk about the importance of creating new traditions after changes.  For us, maintaining an old tradition was meaningful.

This year marks a different challenge.  Busyness with many things and several events happening beyond my control.  I’m needed to walk step-by-step, making choices about how to use my time and who to spend time with.  At first I felt disappointed and overwhelmed.  But, as time goes on, I realize that I am using my time and talents for others. If I am still and let God be God over my days, I am more aware of the reason for the season.  Awesome things happen when I have the courage to go where God leads and then see His blessings when I look in the rear view mirror.  May I go forward, “glorifying and praising God”.

May you and yours be richly blessed at Christmas and all through 2018.

P.S. Christmas dinner at our home was delicious again this year.

 

 

Finding Comfort and Help in God: Lessons from Psalm 121 and Romans 8:38-39

Where does my help come from?

There are many ways in which we try to make our lives feel better.  Often we look for the solution through other people.  We think that if the other person would apologize for hurting us, then we would feel better.  We think that if we could just tell them how their “mistakes” have affected our lives, then life would be easier to bear.  Or, if they would help us sort through our problems, then our problems might be solved.  Our thoughts and behaviour get very wrapped up in the actions of others.

Another source of comfort for us can be food or other physical things.  Some people eat for comfort, some people shop for comfort and some people hoard to feel safe.  So many things can affect our ability to have these things be effective.  We put on too much weight and need to watch how much we eat.  We come to a financial slow down and  need to control our spending.  We run out of space for all of our stuff or need to move.  It’s very easy for these sources of comfort to be affected by circumstances beyond our control.

We often feel a bit better when we focus a bit more on ourselves.  However, sometimes we can become too self-focused and lose our ability to share our lives with others.  We think that only our opinion matters, only looking at the world through our eyes can be right and only I can know what is best for me.  Our focus is no longer to make ourselves more useful to others by being healthy physically, emotionally and spiritually.

There thoughts remind me of the question in Psalm 121.  Where does my help come from?
I lift up my eyes to the mountains—  where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord,     the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip—   he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel     will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord watches over you—     the Lord is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day,     nor the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all harm—   he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going  both now and forevermore.

Psalm 121 tells us that “my help come from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth”.  Our help does not come from people, things or ourselves.  Psalm 121 reminds us that God is our Security, our Protection and that He is with us along every step of life’s journey.  God is the right and only source that is constant and everlasting.

Romans 8: 38 – 39

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons neither the present nor the future, nor any powers,  neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.   

Finding Strength and Hope Through Unexpected Challenges

Do you ever have those days when you feel stuck?  Or you don’t know what to do next?  Or you wonder if you should do something or nothing?  I seem to have days, times, seasons like that. I know that others have walked similar paths.  I have read or heard their stories and been encouraged. Right now, my life has taken an unexpected direction.  I need to remember that “faith is taking the first step even when you can’t see the whole staircase.” (Martin Luther King Jr.)

Almost a year ago, I had surgery to correct a condition I had.  I thought that everything would be “normal” after that.  I had complications during surgery, so initially, I thought I was recovering from surgery.  After some time, I thought I had to recover from recovering.  I started to make some lifestyle changes which seemed to make a difference, but I still struggled.

Recently, I’ve realized that my surgery has left me with a “permanent” less serious condition.  However, it is life-changing and adjustments have to be made– physically and emotionally.

Dealing with my physical symptoms and changes has been a challenge.  There have been many prayers by myself and others.  The answer to those prayers hasn’t been total healing — a miraculous transformation of the changes that have been made to my body.  The answers have come in quiet direction in various ways of how to live differently and more effectively with the “new me”.   This is an ongoing process and I thank God for not giving up on me through my tears and frustration.

Looking at my future through a different lens is harder. Sometimes I feel like I’m making a mountain out of a molehill. “Am I depressed?”, I ask myself.  I may be a bit depressed, though I believe it is more like a situational crisis.  The Free Dictionary describes a situational crisis in psychiatry as “an unexpected crisis that arises suddenly in response to an external event or a conflict concerning a specific circumstance. The symptoms are transient, and the episode is usually brief”. I have to recognize that  ignoring a molehill would not be a good idea.

It is taking a bit of time for me to refocus my life .  In the past I have gone through a necessary divorce and a few major moves that I chose to make.  God led me to and through those situations.  I’ll admit that I am a bit blind-sided by what God is doing now. Trusting God and remembering His love for me gives strength and courage for each day.

I know that God knows exactly where I am and that His love for me and His plans for me have not changed. Slowly, I am starting to anticipate the “next steps” in a positive way.  I am starting to recognize deep within that God has prepared me for this time — that different will be OK.

Psalm 23
A psalm of David.
The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake.
Even though I walk
through the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
Surely your goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
forever.

 

 

Embracing God’s Plan: The Patient Process of Personal Transformation

A few days ago I read about a girl whose hair became a horribly tangled mess as a result of a deep depression that had lasted for quite a while.  Once she had the energy to care what she looked like, she didn’t have the time, energy or perhaps the ability to get the tangles out.  In her desperation for change, she went to a hairdresser to have her head shaved.   Much to her surprise, rather than shave her head, the hairdresser spent thirteen hours over the next two days detangling her hair and styling it.  It was an amazing transformation!

When I think of that scenario, one mental picture really resonates with me.  The picture of that girl sitting still in that chair while the hairdresser works hour after hour to detangle her hair.  So often I am very impatient.  I want a quick fix.  I don’t want to experience the pulls, and ouches and time involved in detangling.  I want God to fix my life NOW.  I want to see results on a daily basis.  It’s hard for me to sit calmly with head bowed, waiting, trying desperately to trust. “Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for Him” (Psalm 37:7)

Some days it’s easy to trust that God is in control.   But sometimes, my journey feels too hard and too unfair.  I get so caught up in “what isn’t” that I lose track of “what is”.  My life shouldn’t be about what I can see.  My life should be about what God is doing.  “And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose for them” (Romans 8:28)

I have seen the transformation God is able to do in people’s lives — how He is able to change them inside and out.  With some people the changes are profound and visibly obvious.  I think that it’s harder for me to recognize changes in myself.  If I believe that God has “plans to prosper me and not to harm me, plans to give me hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11), then I need to recognize that He is changing me to make me who I need to be.  “He has made everything beautiful in it’s time…yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end” (Ecclesiastes 3:11)

And so, today, I have a different picture of how I wait patiently for God to transform me.  When life seems out of control, I want to remember that I am not the “de-tangler”, God is.  I want to remember that He is working out His plan for me through all the lessons He teaches me in His Word, through all of life’s highs and lows and through all the people He puts in my path.  “For we are God’s masterpiece.  He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things He planned for us long ago.” (Ephesians 2:10)

Trusting God’s Ways: Finding Guidance and Wisdom in Obedience

When we walk with the Lord, our prayer is: Show me your ways, Lord, teach me your paths.  Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long. (Psalm 25:4-5)

And God response is: I instruct you in the way of wisdom and lead you along straight paths. (Proverbs 4:11).  Yet, when life takes unexpected twists and turns, we start to doubt the things God has been teaching and showing us.

 

Recently I read this quote by Sinclair Ferguson: Be obedient even when you don’t know where obedience may lead you.  It reminded me of the words from Isaiah 55:8 ~ “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord.

There was a time when I had to make a tough decision about my life, a life-altering decision.  God was very present during that time and I felt Him leading me.  Still, it wasn’t easy to make the necessary changes and sometimes I doubted if I had made the right choices.  It wasn’t until several years later that I discovered that my decision had a huge impact, a life-giving impact, on someone else.  God knew more than I did.

Psalm 138:8 says: The Lord will vindicate me; your love, Lord, endures forever — do not abandon the works of your hands.  I had to look up that word “vindicate”.

Vin·di·cate – to clear someone of blame or suspicion; to show or prove to be right, reasonable or justified.

I believe that when I walk in obedience, I can trust God to take care of the parts of my life that I don’t understand.  Do I always trust God?  No, but I am trying more and more to accept the things I don’t understand as being in God’s control. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.  (Proverbs 3:5-6)

 

In Psalm 23, God gives me an awesome picture of His promises for now and eternity.

 

The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
    for his name’s sake.

 Even though I walk
    through the darkest valley,[a]
I will fear no evil,
    for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
    they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me
    in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
    my cup overflows.
Surely your goodness and love will follow me
    all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
    forever.

 

May He refresh your soul as you walk boldly, in trust, where He leads!

 

World War II Love Story: A Tribute to My Parents

Today, June 14, 2017, is seventy-one year since my parents got married.  The following paragraphs are the words of dedication taken from my book —My Tapestry — Experiencing the Love of the Designer 

For My Parents

 With Thanks to GodDuring World War II, my parents lived in the Netherlands, which was occupied by Nazi Germany.  It was a very difficult time, and hard choices had to be made.  Near the end of the war, my parents were engaged and working in the Wieringermeer polder, which was low-lying land reclaimed from the sea.  Dikes and pumping engines kept the land dry.

In the beginning of 1945, under German command, Dutch workers dug deep holes at the bottom and at the top of the dikes.  Each hole was loaded with unexploded bombs from British and American aircraft.  On April 17, 1945, at 12:45 a.m. the explosives were ignited.  The seven thousand people who lived in the Wieringermeer and the estimated one to two thousand refugees had to leave the polder.  Within forty-eight hours the entire polder was filled with water.  The people living there had been warned and there was no loss of life.

On April 22, 1945, my father, then twenty-four years old, wrote in his diary that he and my mother went to look at the polder from part of the dike.  He wrote, “It was a sorry sight– water all over with here and there a rooftop and tree showing.  If we didn’t know God cares for us, we would be devastated… The Lord is right in all His ways and works.”

After my father died, my brother Len wrote Afterword — the final words about Dad’s life– as an ending to my father’s autobiography, A Life of Grace and Blessings.  Len wrote, “In his book, Dad talked about his engagement to Mom years before.  He said, ‘We loved each other dearly.’  For sixty-two and a half years their love for each other grew stronger and deeper.  It was at the heart of the family, and it blessed everyone they knew.”

My parents’ example of trust in God and their love for each other greatly shaped my life.  I thank God for the parents He gave me and for the example they were to me and my children.  I dedicate this book to the special memories of my parents.

Health Care and Healthy Living: A Canadian Perspective

Today, May 4, 2017, the US is having its first vote on a new health care plan.  As I read about the people that will no longer be getting services, it makes me sad.  There seem to be so many factors that add to the difficulty of making health care available to all in that country — insurance companies, pharmaceutical companies and a government that isn’t buying in to the need for coverage for all.

As I read all this, I am thankful for the health care we have in Canada.  This year is 45 years since I started my nursing career: first by going to nursing school, followed by 43 years of working as a Registered Nurse.  I have cared for many patients/residents/clients in several different settings.

Today, I was thinking about health care and healthy living.  What does it take to maintain health?  There is evidence that important steps are eating well, drinking enough fluids each day, maintaining a good weight, exercise, getting enough sleep, controlling stress and having FUN AND LAUGHTER in your life.

Do we do what we need to do to take responsibility for my own health?  Do we reach for  medications when there are healthier options?  Do we get medical assistance when we need it rather than waiting until we have a serious problem?  Some of these are ways we abuse our “free” health in Canada.

I hope that the medical system in Canada starts to do more to encourage people to focus on preventative medicine.  What can I do to help myself and others do better?  Lots of ideas start coming to mind.  Walking with a friend, cooking lessons to help people cook healthier food, understanding another person’s limits, and most importantly, adding FUN and LAUGHTER to the lives of others.

Please share your ideas in the comments.  Spring is here — great time to make some changes in our lives!!

 

The Power of Positivity: Let Your Light Shine to Make a Better World

Reading the news this morning was very depressing — as it often is these days.  It wasn’t a very good way to start my day.  Then, out of some far-away storage place in my mind, I started humming an old Sunday School song: “This little light of mine, I’m going to let it shine…”  That’s when I realized that I can’t control all the “crazy” stuff that is happening in the word. but there is something I can control —  “my light”.

“Hide it under a bushel — No!  I’m going to let it shine”  Each of us has our own abilities and therefore ways of letting our light shine.  However the easiest way to let our light shine is through our smile.  Smile at everyone, everywhere  — purposefully — to spread joy.  Small acts of kindness are also very meaningful.  They help remind other people that they are noticed and that their needs are recognized, even the little things.  Being more intentional in out interactions with others is a great way to let our light shine.

“Don’t let Satan blow it out — I’m going to let it shine”.  So many things, like reading the news, can rob us of our joy.  Everything seems hopeless and overwhelming and we retreat into a darker place. We can become discouraged when we don’t get back when we give to others, when our efforts don’t seem to be appreciated.  Life becomes harder, too, when we don’t take care of ourselves physically, emotionally and spiritually. Being more intentional about the things we expose ourselves to, being realistic about our expectations and taking care of ourselves, can help our light keep shining.

“Let it shine ’til Jesus comes–I’m going to let it shine”.  Hopefully being more positive in all areas of our lives can become a lifetime habit.  It would be a better world for all of us. So much of our lives is about the choices we make.  Many years ago, I sang with abandon:  “This little light of mine, I’m going to let it shine”.   I had no idea then how difficult it might be to live out those words some days.  But if each of us can agree that change starts “with me”, we can make the world a brighter place.  LET YOUR LIGHT SHINE!!

 

Overcoming Life’s Challenges: Finding Strength and Hope in Tough Times

There are many times when life doesn’t happen the way we expect it to. We have a picture in our minds about our future and our dreams are shattered.  We may feel hurt, betrayed or confused.  Sometimes we don’t know who we can blame for the situation, sometimes we have to own up to our own responsibility.  Mostly, we just want the pain to go away and for everything to feel better.
Situations that are beyond our control can be especially difficult.  We ask: “Why did this happen to me?”  “Why did a person that I loved die?” “Why did that accident happen?” “Why did I get this illness?”  “How will I cope with the loss of my job/ my marriage?”  Our lives are thrown into turmoil and our future becomes scary and uncertain.  For a time it is difficult to make any decisions about our future and the situation feels even worse.  In time, we want life to feel better again and we begin to crawl forward.
There are also times when the choices we make have damaging consequences; sometimes those consequences affect us and sometimes they affect others.  We don’t take care of ourselves physically, spiritually and/or emotionally.  We become addicted to drugs, alcohol. gambling, shopping or something else that takes control of our lives.  We have an affair or an abortion.  We mistreat other people or their property.  It is possible to ignore some of these situations for a long time, but then we recognize that change is needed or further destruction is in our future.
Socrates said: What screws us up most in life is the picture in our head of how it’s supposed to be”. It may be a long time since we looked at that picture, but it is still probably there. No matter the reason for our circumstance, we have to allow ourselves the opportunity to grieve the loss of that picture before we can move forward.  The five stages of grief and loss are: denial and isolation, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.  People don’t necessarily go through the stages in the same order or experience all of them. 
 
It’s often difficult for others to watch us go through the process.  They want our lives to be better NOW;they want to be the person who can help us; they don’t want to have to watch us “struggle”.  This can be a confusing time for everyone affected by the situation. A person going through tough times may find support from  different sources than they usually did. This may be  surprising, difficult and/or disappointing for the person going through change.  It may also be difficult for those who normally support the person and now need to “let go”.  We can’t all have the capacity to help our family and friends in every situation.
 
Changing the picture in our head isn’t easy. We may hope to revert back to a former place in our lives where everything felt better, but perhaps as we change, that former place no longer is a good fit for us.  Often it is necessary to get the help of professionals or others who have experienced the same challenges through some sort of group situation.  God can change us in an instant, but often He challenges us to do the hard work of change.
 
 It’s hard to “let go and let God”; to take each day as a gift and look forward to the adventure of the day.    It is necessary to take the next step forward without looking back.  There may be huge consequences of our past mistakes, but after we have grieved them, we have to build our tomorrow with what we’ve learned; the lessons that make us stronger.  
 
When life disappoints, there may be rapid changes and many hard times.  Through it all may we look to the Creator to create the new picture in our head that needs to become our focus.  May our trust in Him grow more and more.
 
Psalm 143:8 ~ Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life.