Life Lessons – Page 3 – My Tapestry Blog

Trusting God’s Plan: Embracing Life’s Interruptions

I feel kind of depressed today…Do you ever have the feeling that life has passed you by? Worse than that… I sometimes think that life and I are going in opposite directions. ~ Charles M. Schulz

I find it too easy to form an idea in my mind of what I think my life “should” be like. One change.from my original plans was obviously a good change. Growing up, I dreamed of becoming a teacher when I grew up. However, in my later teens, I decided to go into nursing instead. My nursing career has been a blessing to me in many ways. This brief, almost unnoticeable interruption, led me down a different path.

A life change that was difficult and I still don’t quite understand, was the end of my marriage. There have been times when moving forward felt more like trudging forward. The pain and devastation that comes from a broken family has affected us all. This interruption was a tearing up of “the plan”. It was a struggle to start over again with purpose.

“What one calls the interruptions are precisely one’s real life – the life God is sending one day by day.” ~ C.S. Lewis

Learning to accept the interruptions God sends into my life can sometimes be challenging. I say that I trust Him, but I want to understand what He is doing and why He is doing it. Many times I pray for a glimpse into the future. I need reassurance that everything is going to be OK. And… often God gives me that reassurance. I am discovering more and more that even when things don’t happen according to MY plan, all is well.

“The discipline of waiting build character and besides, rushing the process may lead to a path that misses God’s best.” Dr. Charles Stanley

Waiting to buy a new home for the children and I after my marriage ended was a difficult time of waiting. I hoped for a new beginning, but it was a LONG time coming. I found a house I liked, but it was to expensive and the house we were living in was not selling. After almost 1 1/2 years, within a week, one house was sold and another house was bought. We had a new home! The house that had been too expensive was at a lower price by then. God was so abundantly GOOD!!

Do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised. ~ Hebrews 10:35-36

There have been plans/dreams that God gives me and then I wait and wait. Waiting can become an interruption. It can cause a “pause” in the flow if my life. However, slowly, life experiences are helping me to live each day as He gives it to me, not matter what I think the future may hold. Sometimes life seems to progress slowly…. and sometimes I can’t keep up with all the changes. God’s timing is not my timing— and His ways are not my ways. May I live for Him each day with joy, knowing that His love for me is intricately woven through the tapestry of my life.

“If you’re God’s child, remember that your story is marching to an end that is glorious beyond the ability of your mind to conceive.” ~ Paul David Tripp

Finding Hope and Healing: 4 Steps to Overcome Darkness

There are many situations that can cause darkness in our lives — depression, a sudden life change (death of a loved on, divorce, miscarriage, broken trust, health issues), situations beyond our understanding were we can only say “God is God and I am not”…..

When I was doing research for my book, I found four steps for “coming out of the dark”, and then, in two different articles, found supporting scripture texts for those steps. I found that those steps fit perfectly into my personal experience. Finding my “way out” after my divorce was a journey with God. God, meeting me at the point of my need every step of the way. And so… I will share.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wait- I will give you treasure of darkness, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the Lord the God of Israel, who summons you by name. Isaiah 45:3. It was during those dark days of tears, brokenness and despair that God began to pour His love over me by reminding me of times and situations that had been stored inside of me. He also blessed me when I listened to CDs that I had had for a long time, but now the words were just what I needed to hear. Time and again, God reminded me that my situation was no secret to Him. He had put events, people and things into my life for my time of need. God knew my name– He knew my need.

Cry out for help- I waited patiently for the Lord, He turned to me and heard my cry. Psalm 40:1. Soon, I wanted to “feel better”. My head was telling me to “get over it”, but my heart wasn’t ready. Fortunately, I was able to listen to my heart and wait on God. It was almost six months before I read the words of Isaiah 43: 18: Forget the former things.. and I knew that God was prodding me to start moving forward. During the next season, God placed people and situations in my life that gave me the courage to look at the possibility of a better tomorrow. Instead of being carried by God, I was trusting that I could walk where He led me.

Count on the Lord to come through- Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble and He saved them from distress and the deepest gloom and broke away their chains. Psalm 107:13-14. As I walked with Him, God led me into places and situations that were new and challenging. There were tough conversations with loved ones. I learned to let go of someone I had hoped was part of the long-term plan. I had to re-evaluate my strengths and priorities. I began to see who I was apart from everyone else. Memories of “distress and gloom” slowly became more distant. Life became richer and fuller and others began noticing the changes.

Be patient – Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. Philippians 1:6. As I became more aware of coming out of the darkness, I became more aware of the need to take care of “me”, especially physically. God had blessed me with His presence, comfort and care which helped me grow in my spiritual life. Then He had helped me break the chains of distress and deepest gloom, freeing me emotionally. But God’s “good work” in me also included my physical being. Awesome God to care for me in ways I had ignored for a long time. When He plans a “good work”, He knows all the ingredients that are needed to make it possible

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There were many factors that contributed to the situation I found myself in at the end of my marriage. God worked in powerful ways as I came out of the darkness. I learned lessons that will bless me for a lifetime. I’ve needed to apply them again and again as I walk towards that day of completion in Christ Jesus. With God’s help, it gets easier to focus on the destination as I enjoy the steps of the journey. Maybe God is whispering: Go forth and have FUN!!

9 Ways to Embrace Stillness and Improve Your Life

A new year is quickly approaching — 2018! It seems like only yesterday that I was reading “1984” for English class and 1984 seemed a long way away. Between then and now my life has had changes, additions, deletions, excitement and despair. Through it all, my relationship with God has deepened and I seek to know Him more and more.

One challenge that I have is that I try to do TOO much. It’s important that I learn not to take on more than I can handle. More importantly, I shouldn’t take on situations that God never intends me to. Exodus 14:14 says: “The Lord will fight for you, you need only be still.” In the stillness, He will lead me and guide me on the paths He chooses for me. Today I found a list of 9 things that may help me as I try to make some needed changes.

let go — purge It is important to let go of “stuff”, emotions and even some people that are interfering with my ability to be still. Things that interfere with my ability to create a quiet, peaceful atmosphere for myself, inwardly and outwardly

say “no” – Not everything someone asks me to do or every idea that comes to mind needs to be nor should be acted on. Sometimes using stalling tactics is the best way to handle these situations. I need to step back and consider before I act or consent to getting involved.

use your calendar – When I was working shifts and weekends when my children were in school, I sometimes took a morning to read a book. Later, I took a “rest day” at sometime during the week if I worked the weekend. But now, with my children grown and working on a casual basis, I sometimes don’t take the break I need, especially the mental break. I need those times to “be still”.

don’t over commit – There are so many activities to get involved with, especially as a member of an active church. Yes, it’s great to be involved, but I need to know my limits. For me, it works best to choose one or two weekly activities to be involved with and then “help out” as I can in other areas.

prioritize – This can be a challenge for me. Often my “to do” list is quite long and I am running out of time before the most important tasks are done. Clutter makes me feel disorganized, so I should probably start putting things where they belong before I even start on my list. Everyone’s priorities are different and I think it’s important to respect your own.

use a timer – This is an concept that I will experiment with. I think that this will be most useful with the way I spend time on social media — or watching TV — or tackling some of the tasks I don’t like doing (break the job into “bite-sized” pieces).

set boundaries – It is so easy for me to be pulled into other people’s situations. Many times I am probably aware of these mental and physical needs for a reason. But sometimes, I take on too much. I feel resentment, tired, overwhelmed, and “not still”. Maybe I need to pray more and do less. I definitely need to be aware of whether I am doing what God calls me to do.

delegate – Sometimes I’m not even thinking about what other resources are available for a situation besides me. Delegation done well can create a team spirit and bless everyone involved. Delegating frees me to do the things I am meant to do. When I am doing the things I am meant to do, I will feel “still” even in a busy situation.

establish habits– My challenge in this area is that I often try to establish habits that don’t fit me. There are so many ideas out that of what we should do and where we should go and how we should spend our time. It’s easy to try to follow a plan that doesn’t work. I want to establish habits that help me love God and my neighbour and that help me “be still”. Habits that help me “be still” as I care for myself physically, emotionally and spiritually.

Another year is dawning. My I use it well!!

Please feel free to share your thoughts and ideas in the comments section. Blessings for a wonderful 2108!!

Embracing Differences: Lessons of Acceptance and Growth

Last evening I attended a Cake Night event at a local Christian recovery house to support the artist who drew the pencil drawing attached to this blog post. It was a first time experience for me. There were many stories of how God changes lives and how a steadfast faith in God is needed in difficult battles in our lives. It was a blessing to have those truths reaffirmed.

However, there was another aspect that was talked about by many. The men talked about how their lives had been, and continue to be, affected by those around them. There were examples of mutual support and examples of wisdom shared. But for me, the most impressive, and perhaps life-changing, encounters these men had were something I hadn’t expected: learning to accept someone who is different. Stories were told of conflicts of various kinds and how adapting in these relationships led to gaining a friend and to personal growth.

Sharing my story is something I had to learn. For years, I hid the reality of my situation by pretending that everything was fine and my life was “normal”. Attending Divorce Care was a blessing. I felt a freedom to share there. Instead of looks of unbelief, there were knowing nods — and acceptance. There were many ways in which I was different from the others in my Divorce Care group, but by sharing what we had in common those differences didn’t matter. I hope that I can offer acceptance more and more in all situation; that my knowing nods can be about accepting the way the person feels without looks of unbelief.

There are still many layers of “my onion” that need to be removed. But one thing I am learning: as the layers are removed, I grow. I allow myself to grow into the person God intends me to be. There is power in sharing our situations, in working through difficult situations and in extending love and care to those we may not understand.

Matthew 25: 35 – 36 says: For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me. There is no mention of “when I understood you or when you are worthy of my attention. Matthew 10:14 says: If anyone will not welcome you or listen to your words, leave that home or town and shake the dust off your feet. Sadly, sometimes we are not ready or are unwilling to accept the help that is offered.

Each of us has something to give. Each of us has lessons we still need to learn. That’s what I heard last evening. Stories shared about men who gave and who received. May we all open our hearts wide with willingness to give and receive.

Finding Comfort and Help in God: Lessons from Psalm 121 and Romans 8:38-39

Where does my help come from?

There are many ways in which we try to make our lives feel better. Often we look for the solution through other people. We think that if the other person would apologize for hurting us, then we would feel better. We think that if we could just tell them how their “mistakes” have affected our lives, then life would be easier to bear. Or, if they would help us sort through our problems, then our problems might be solved. Our thoughts and behaviour get very wrapped up in the actions of others.

Another source of comfort for us can be food or other physical things. Some people eat for comfort, some people shop for comfort and some people hoard to feel safe. So many things can affect our ability to have these things be effective. We put on too much weight and need to watch how much we eat. We come to a financial slow down and need to control our spending. We run out of space for all of our stuff or need to move. It’s very easy for these sources of comfort to be affected by circumstances beyond our control.

We often feel a bit better when we focus a bit more on ourselves. However, sometimes we can become too self-focused and lose our ability to share our lives with others. We think that only our opinion matters, only looking at the world through our eyes can be right and only I can know what is best for me. Our focus is no longer to make ourselves more useful to others by being healthy physically, emotionally and spiritually.

There thoughts remind me of the question in Psalm 121. Where does my help come from?
I lift up my eyes to the mountains— where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip— he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord watches over you— the Lord is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all harm— he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.

Psalm 121 tells us that “my help come from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth”. Our help does not come from people, things or ourselves. Psalm 121 reminds us that God is our Security, our Protection and that He is with us along every step of life’s journey. God is the right and only source that is constant and everlasting.

Romans 8: 38 – 39

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Finding Strength and Hope Through Unexpected Challenges

Do you ever have those days when you feel stuck? Or you don’t know what to do next? Or you wonder if you should do something or nothing? I seem to have days, times, seasons like that. I know that others have walked similar paths. I have read or heard their stories and been encouraged. Right now, my life has taken an unexpected direction. I need to remember that “faith is taking the first step even when you can’t see the whole staircase.” (Martin Luther King Jr.)

Almost a year ago, I had surgery to correct a condition I had. I thought that everything would be “normal” after that. I had complications during surgery, so initially, I thought I was recovering from surgery. After some time, I thought I had to recover from recovering. I started to make some lifestyle changes which seemed to make a difference, but I still struggled.

Recently, I’ve realized that my surgery has left me with a “permanent” less serious condition. However, it is life-changing and adjustments have to be made– physically and emotionally.

Dealing with my physical symptoms and changes has been a challenge. There have been many prayers by myself and others. The answer to those prayers hasn’t been total healing — a miraculous transformation of the changes that have been made to my body. The answers have come in quiet direction in various ways of how to live differently and more effectively with the “new me”. This is an ongoing process and I thank God for not giving up on me through my tears and frustration.

Looking at my future through a different lens is harder. Sometimes I feel like I’m making a mountain out of a molehill. “Am I depressed?”, I ask myself. I may be a bit depressed, though I believe it is more like a situational crisis. The Free Dictionary describes a situational crisis in psychiatry as “an unexpected crisis that arises suddenly in response to an external event or a conflict concerning a specific circumstance. The symptoms are transient, and the episode is usually brief”. I have to recognize that ignoring a molehill would not be a good idea.

It is taking a bit of time for me to refocus my life . In the past I have gone through a necessary divorce and a few major moves that I chose to make. God led me to and through those situations. I’ll admit that I am a bit blind-sided by what God is doing now. Trusting God and remembering His love for me gives strength and courage for each day.

I know that God knows exactly where I am and that His love for me and His plans for me have not changed. Slowly, I am starting to anticipate the “next steps” in a positive way. I am starting to recognize deep within that God has prepared me for this time — that different will be OK.

Psalm 23
A psalm of David.
The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake.
Even though I walk
through the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
Surely your goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
forever.

Embracing God’s Plan: The Patient Process of Personal Transformation

A few days ago I read about a girl whose hair became a horribly tangled mess as a result of a deep depression that had lasted for quite a while. Once she had the energy to care what she looked like, she didn’t have the time, energy or perhaps the ability to get the tangles out. In her desperation for change, she went to a hairdresser to have her head shaved. Much to her surprise, rather than shave her head, the hairdresser spent thirteen hours over the next two days detangling her hair and styling it. It was an amazing transformation!

When I think of that scenario, one mental picture really resonates with me. The picture of that girl sitting still in that chair while the hairdresser works hour after hour to detangle her hair. So often I am very impatient. I want a quick fix. I don’t want to experience the pulls, and ouches and time involved in detangling. I want God to fix my life NOW. I want to see results on a daily basis. It’s hard for me to sit calmly with head bowed, waiting, trying desperately to trust. “Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for Him” (Psalm 37:7)

Some days it’s easy to trust that God is in control. But sometimes, my journey feels too hard and too unfair. I get so caught up in “what isn’t” that I lose track of “what is”. My life shouldn’t be about what I can see. My life should be about what God is doing. “And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose for them” (Romans 8:28)

I have seen the transformation God is able to do in people’s lives — how He is able to change them inside and out. With some people the changes are profound and visibly obvious. I think that it’s harder for me to recognize changes in myself. If I believe that God has “plans to prosper me and not to harm me, plans to give me hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11), then I need to recognize that He is changing me to make me who I need to be. “He has made everything beautiful in it’s time…yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end” (Ecclesiastes 3:11)

And so, today, I have a different picture of how I wait patiently for God to transform me. When life seems out of control, I want to remember that I am not the “de-tangler”, God is. I want to remember that He is working out His plan for me through all the lessons He teaches me in His Word, through all of life’s highs and lows and through all the people He puts in my path. “For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things He planned for us long ago.” (Ephesians 2:10)

Trusting God’s Ways: Finding Guidance and Wisdom in Obedience

When we walk with the Lord, our prayer is: Show me your ways, Lord, teach me your paths. Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long. (Psalm 25:4-5)

And God response is: I instruct you in the way of wisdom and lead you along straight paths. (Proverbs 4:11). Yet, when life takes unexpected twists and turns, we start to doubt the things God has been teaching and showing us.

Recently I read this quote by Sinclair Ferguson: Be obedient even when you don’t know where obedience may lead you. It reminded me of the words from Isaiah 55:8 ~ “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord.

There was a time when I had to make a tough decision about my life, a life-altering decision. God was very present during that time and I felt Him leading me. Still, it wasn’t easy to make the necessary changes and sometimes I doubted if I had made the right choices. It wasn’t until several years later that I discovered that my decision had a huge impact, a life-giving impact, on someone else. God knew more than I did.

Psalm 138:8 says: The Lord will vindicate me; your love, Lord, endures forever — do not abandon the works of your hands. I had to look up that word “vindicate”.

Vin·di·cate – to clear someone of blame or suspicion; to show or prove to be right, reasonable or justified.

I believe that when I walk in obedience, I can trust God to take care of the parts of my life that I don’t understand. Do I always trust God? No, but I am trying more and more to accept the things I don’t understand as being in God’s control. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6)

In Psalm 23, God gives me an awesome picture of His promises for now and eternity.

The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
for his name’s sake.

Even though I walk
    through the darkest valley,^[a]
I will fear no evil,
    for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
    they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me
    in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
    my cup overflows.
Surely your goodness and love will follow me
    all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
    forever.

May He refresh your soul as you walk boldly, in trust, where He leads!

Health Care and Healthy Living: A Canadian Perspective

Today, May 4, 2017, the US is having its first vote on a new health care plan. As I read about the people that will no longer be getting services, it makes me sad. There seem to be so many factors that add to the difficulty of making health care available to all in that country — insurance companies, pharmaceutical companies and a government that isn’t buying in to the need for coverage for all.

As I read all this, I am thankful for the health care we have in Canada. This year is 45 years since I started my nursing career: first by going to nursing school, followed by 43 years of working as a Registered Nurse. I have cared for many patients/residents/clients in several different settings.

Today, I was thinking about health care and healthy living. What does it take to maintain health? There is evidence that important steps are eating well, drinking enough fluids each day, maintaining a good weight, exercise, getting enough sleep, controlling stress and having FUN AND LAUGHTER in your life.

Do we do what we need to do to take responsibility for my own health? Do we reach for medications when there are healthier options? Do we get medical assistance when we need it rather than waiting until we have a serious problem? Some of these are ways we abuse our “free” health in Canada.

I hope that the medical system in Canada starts to do more to encourage people to focus on preventative medicine. What can I do to help myself and others do better? Lots of ideas start coming to mind. Walking with a friend, cooking lessons to help people cook healthier food, understanding another person’s limits, and most importantly, adding FUN and LAUGHTER to the lives of others.

Please share your ideas in the comments. Spring is here — great time to make some changes in our lives!!

The Power of Positivity: Let Your Light Shine to Make a Better World

Reading the news this morning was very depressing — as it often is these days. It wasn’t a very good way to start my day. Then, out of some far-away storage place in my mind, I started humming an old Sunday School song: “This little light of mine, I’m going to let it shine…” That’s when I realized that I can’t control all the “crazy” stuff that is happening in the word. but there is something I can control — “my light”.

“Hide it under a bushel — No! I’m going to let it shine” Each of us has our own abilities and therefore ways of letting our light shine. However the easiest way to let our light shine is through our smile. Smile at everyone, everywhere — purposefully — to spread joy. Small acts of kindness are also very meaningful. They help remind other people that they are noticed and that their needs are recognized, even the little things. Being more intentional in out interactions with others is a great way to let our light shine.

“Don’t let Satan blow it out — I’m going to let it shine”. So many things, like reading the news, can rob us of our joy. Everything seems hopeless and overwhelming and we retreat into a darker place. We can become discouraged when we don’t get back when we give to others, when our efforts don’t seem to be appreciated. Life becomes harder, too, when we don’t take care of ourselves physically, emotionally and spiritually. Being more intentional about the things we expose ourselves to, being realistic about our expectations and taking care of ourselves, can help our light keep shining.

“Let it shine ’til Jesus comes–I’m going to let it shine”. Hopefully being more positive in all areas of our lives can become a lifetime habit. It would be a better world for all of us. So much of our lives is about the choices we make. Many years ago, I sang with abandon: “This little light of mine, I’m going to let it shine”. I had no idea then how difficult it might be to live out those words some days. But if each of us can agree that change starts “with me”, we can make the world a brighter place. LET YOUR LIGHT SHINE!!